In the future we'll all be gay
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
