True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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