I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Randomize
