Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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