My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
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She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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