Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Randomize
