I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
