I smell stomach acid.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize