O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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