I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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