Are we in a gay sports bar?
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
