After last night, I could never be a politician.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Randomize