I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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