I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
