i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
