Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize