talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
