the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
