Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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