i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
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