I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
