I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize