so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
