I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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