also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Randomize
