marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
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