whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
