ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
