This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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