all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
