just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
