just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
