Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
