love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I'm always down for nudity.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
