The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Four minutes until I can fart!
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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