on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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