fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Randomize