There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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