so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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