Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
