It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
and you said cock pushups were impossible
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
