Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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