I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
