girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
