we have pet lesbian snakes
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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