You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
