At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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