I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
