tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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