I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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